Chastened yet Loved

(Hebrews 12:6).. because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.

Some of us must assume that Love 💓 associate with affection, tenderness, warmth, intimacy, attachment, endearment, devoted. But how if someone shows you his passionate affection by breaking you down, can you consider it's love?

Yeah I ever felt that way last year; God shows me His deep love by breaking my heart.

Strolling down feeds on Facebook, Instagram, and engaging in current issues with another netizens are part of my favorite hobbies so far. I remember last year became the most interesting political era in my country. My favorite governor ; the most honest and brilliant former governor should lose the election because of some personal matters, and I think it's unfair.

As I cannot see justice in my country and as a youth who is still learning in controlling the emotion, I got carried away with the emotions. I stood up with him by pouring out all of my judgments on my mind with harsh words towards that issues to my status on social media that may offend some people, because I carried religion issues on my status. I knew I was wrong that time, but I did not care, I still thought that I had a right to express my opinion as citizen and stood up for justices even in wrong way.

One time in the morning I read my Bible, God rebuked me gently through His verses on:

(Jude 1:9) But when the archangel Michael, contending with the devil, was disputing about the body of Moses, he did not presume to pronounce a blasphemous judgment, but said, “The Lord rebuke you.” 

I did realized that it's the way God wanted to tell me that I have to stop doing that. But rather than paying attention to His command, I still kept doing that wrong thing HAHA, what a definitely stubborn child 🙊🙊, I'm so sorry Lord I promise I will carefully watch my mouth & my fingers 😞😟😢.

And this was the time when God chastened me. When I was out of town with my senior-high friends & teacher, suddenly my teacher scolded me that I have offended her. She said it was okay that I did not agree over the results and express my opinion but I should not bring personal issues like religion, racism with harsh words, and judgement without any evidence. Because however it's wrong and you may offend other people who are not involved in that matters.

Gosh, you know what I was feeling right that time? I was extremely ashamed and totally shaken by that. She scolded me in front of my friends 😭😭😭. I felt so guilty that I have offended her. It kept me thinking all day that time.I never forget that time when God rebuked me 😭😭😭😭 but I do also thankful to my teacher that has reminded me.

It changes me a lot. Since then, instead of sharing something controversial, I chose to share something that may be blessing to others such cooking recipes (bcs I love foods soooooooooooooo......muchhhh) and  Instead of arguing the sensitive issues, I prefer spreading something encouraging.

And also I would like to share my close friend's experience.
She is a soft-hearted girl, who infrequently rides motorcycle. At one time, she took me a ride to go home together by her motorcycle. She rode extremely dangerously fast and it made me so anxious. I asked her to ride more slowly (yeah bcs you know it threatened my life lol), instead of following me, she scolded me to shut up. Well until we crushed another motorcycle.

The funny thing is she and I were crushed together so hard, but only her who injured and bleed. I was okay totally fine haha no injuring, no bleeding 😂😂. And she said to me that maybe it's God's way to bend her so that she changes her way in riding motorcycle. It broke her until she does not want to ride any motorcycle anymore.

*** 

We sometimes becomes hard-hearted & argumentative child. And because of our pride and unwillingness, it forces God to take a painful experience sometimes to change us. 

So, instead of being a hard-hearted, let us see our painful experiences from a faith perspective -- it another marks that shows God never gives up on us. He will do anything until His way works on us. ---

May we always recognize His presences and becomes more sensitive of each of His way upon us.