Faith Journey

This is a random thought of me that I think it is a little bit useful to share hahaha.

I met my cousins yesterday and we had a good conversation along the time. He told me about his wife's culture which tends to eat dogs. For your information, I have my beloved dog, which I get from my cousin's wife I told the previous sentences.

Then suddenly I think, maybe if Boy (my dog's name) is not given to me, it probably will be eaten too by my cousin's family. And don't you  think that we may have a similar fate to my own dog? We were actually under the punishment, if God was not that tolerant by giving His only Son to redeem us?

When I sincerely adopt Boy, I do not expect that he could catch all of the rats in my home or helping me out to earn money by its intelligence. Just enough for me to watch him running, playing, eating it has already made my day.

Don't you think that by saving us, God does not expect us to inherit all of the worldly material, popularity, position, and etc (though I don't deny that all of them are formed of God's blessings to us). But more than that, God just wants us to ENJOY our life with Him as what He said (1 Corinthians 10:31) So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

What I mean here, I don't say that we don't have to be ambitious to catch our dreams, on the other hand I want to emphasize that through the journey we are at, God concerns more on the process than the result. I believe a person has ability to accomplish something at office, or doing the house stuff, but God wants you to put your heart into whatever you do.

I think just like as parents to their children; nothing is more happier than seeing their children are grateful with what they have gotten from their parents.  

This is the cute story of Jesus and me on last Christmas!

In January 2019 my colleagues and I celebrated Christmas at office and it got me to home a little bit night than usual. Well of course for some Indonesians maybe it's not as strange thing to get home midnight from the office, however my track from the office to my house isn't that safe; the street lighting is quite dimmed & evolved very little, right of the street is large river and left of the street is rice fields, so can you imagine a woman riding motorcycle alone passed through that street ? hha

Ah yes at that moment I did not have internet quota nor phone credit, so I was little bit worried that something happened to me or my motorcycle because I did not have a companion friend to go home together.

And this is the cutest thing. Bad things that I have thought really happened to me. When I was riding my motorcycle, I was feeling that there was something wrong with it. Its speed was running slower and slower and yes viola my motorbike chain was detached. I thought I would push it all alone until I met a garage to fix it, on the other hand I was also scared cause it was night and I could not call my family to help me cause I was running out of my phone credit.

But it is!! when you consider Jesus as your boyfriend, father, best-friend, He really meant it! HAHA.. He would take care of you even when you can't see Him directly. So, my motorcycle finally stopped, stopped exactly by the person who was selling the tools at a crossroad. The man sincerely helped me by tighten the nuts of the chain with the tools he sold, so it could run again! YEAY 😂😂

Finally, I arrived at home safely.


And my experience reminded me of His promise in Isaiah 46:4. When you feel you have no one to rely on, no friend to talk to, He is the One with His incredible & amazing ways will always provide what you need.

Some of friends think that I'm too strictly to religion, but I guess I'm not. I used to question myself that what if the Lord I think a whole time was actually a wrong God? Because I did not live in that era, how can I prove that Bible was not corrupted because it existed more than 2000 years ago?

But then I ask my heart in silence;

Can I leave Jesus?

And it comes out that it's not about Christian nor Catholic, it's not about religion at all.

How can I leave someone that I belong to?
How can I leave someone if He is the only way to home?

There is something in my heart that I'm longing to, but I don't know exactly what it is.

I'm insecure; I'm anxious; I'm depressed; I'm in a mess, but then I find a comfort in Him, how can I leave someone if He is the only comforter & peace-giver for me?

I'm feeling empty, but then I become whole in Him, how can I leave Him if my truly identity rests in Him?


Whose eyes need to see directly if the heart has been experiencing His pure love,
Nor I need to prove whether the Bible is right or wrong, if I know the Bible is Him; He is the Bible itself.

and

I cannot avoid such a pure love He give me which I never experienced before,

Beberapa pekan ini aku sempat berdiskusi perihal keselamatan sama beberapa orang : "Jika Kasih Karunia orang yang memampukan manusia untuk berada di hadirat Tuhan, apakah artinya perbuatan baik tidak penting? Dan kalaupun cuma percaya sama Yesus aja bisa masuk surga, yaudah kalau gitu kita boleh membunuh dll dong karena kan bukan perbuatan kita yang membawa kita ke surga?" Singkatnya "Apakah perbuatan baik kita berkontribusi pada keselamatan kita?"

Pertama-tama kita harus tau dulu konsep perihal Kekudusan, dan bagaimana Alkitab menekankan bahwa pentingnya untuk hidup Kudus:

TUHAN itu KUDUS; HADIRAT TUHAN; tempat tinggal Tuhan, tanah, pepohonan, atau I can say segala yang ada di dalam Firdaus adalah KUDUS.


Sehingga pada awal sebelum ada dosa/maut, Adam & Hawa punya akses bebas untuk bertemu Tuhan, berbicara langsung sama Tuhan, sebab belum ada dosa, dan mereka masih Kudus. Namun ketika Adam & Hawa berdosa, mereka tidak punya akses lagi untuk ke Hadirat Tuhan.
Perlu diketahui BUKAN KARENA Tuhan menjauhkan diri dari manusia, tapi karena segala yang cacat atau bernoda nggak bisa tinggal ke dalam Kekudusan Tuhan.

Lalu apa hubungannya percaya sama Yesus maka kita bisa layak tinggal dalam hadirat Tuhan?

Yesus adalah bentuk Allah yang Kudus namun bisa bersatu dengan pendosa. Kekudusan Yesus membuktikan bahwa Ia membenci dosa (sebab Yesus tidak berbuat berdosa selama Dia hidup di dunia) namun Dia mengasihi pendosa & bergaul dengan pendosa (sebab Allah bereinkarnasi menjadi daging ke dalam diri Yesus & mengalami maut).

Kalau kita flashback ke Perjanjian Lama, Tuhan memberikan banyak Musa hukum terkait dengan penebusan dosa dengan memberikan pengorbanan Anak Domba yang TIDAK BERCACAT sebagai pinalti atas setiap dosa yang diperbuat umatNya. Berhubungan dengan itu Yesus adalah Persembahan pengapusan dosa terakhir bagi manusia; Yesus adalah Anak Domba yang satu-satunya tidak bercacat; Tuhan Yesus tidak berbuat dosa selama 33 tahun hidup ketika dia menjadi manusia 100%. Sehingga darahNya yang kudus layak untuk menanggung segala kecacatan kita, kita yang nggak Kudus ini bisa dimurnikan sendiri oleh pengorbananNya untuk masuk ke hadirat Tuhan.

Kalau kita ingat dahulu kala, bangsa Israel diselamatkan cuma-cuma pada saat Allah melawat Mesir, karena bangsa Israel mengoleskan darah anak domba sulung yang nggak bercacat di depan pintu rumahnya. Begitupun juga Yesus, maut nggak bisa mengambil anak-anakNya yang telah dimateraikan dengan penebusan darahNya yang kudus.

And back again, gimana kalau case nya kita sudah percaya Yesus, dibaptis, sering ikut kegiatan gereja, rajin berdoa, tapi perbuatan kita nggak mencerminkan Yesus? Masuk surga atau neraka? Padahal kita kan sudah diikat dengan pembaptisan which means kita percaya Yesus?

Aku sebagai Kristiani selalu berpengharap bahwa goal ku bukan masuk surga, tapi aku ingin bertemu Yesus langsung and He said "well done, my daughter" karena aku percaya penebusanku sudah 100% ditanggung Yesus bahkan untuk dosa yang akan datang.

Sebenarnya perbuatan baik bukan ukuran apakah itu yang akan membawa kita ke surga atau nggak, tapi itu ukuran CINTA & BUKTI PERCAYA kita sama YESUS atau nggak.

Let's say, sepasang wanita & pria ada dalam suatu ikatan pernikahan. Mereka sama-sama mengikat janji dalam sakramen pernikahan di depan Altar, secara permukaan kita bisa lihat mereka SALING MENCINTAI, SALING PERCAYA karena sudah dalam ikatan pernikahan suci. Tapi seiring perjalanan waktu, sang suami melakukan kekerasan, nggak pernah menghargai istri, dan selingkuh. Secara umum kita bisa bilang MEREKA SUAMI ISTRI SAH secara status, tapi apakah janji pernikahan tersebut sudah menggambarkan pasti kalau sang suami dengan TULUS MENCITAI istrinya? Cinta dibuktikan dengan perbuatan nyata. 

Begitupun dengan iman kita, ketika kita memutuskan untuk percaya & mengikuti Yesus, kita diikat dalam sebuah pembaptisan, tapi KESUNGGUHAN CINTA & PERCAYA kita kepada Yesus dibuktikan dari perbuatan kita. Namun perbuatan kita bukanlah yang membawa kita ke Hadirat Tuhan, perbuatan kita BUKTI dari KETULUSAN CINTA kita & PERCAYA kita kepada Yesus.

Karena jika tanpa Yesus, dan hanya perbuatan baik yang berkontribusi untuk masuk surga, syarat manusia untuk dapat masuk ke Hadirat Tuhan harus 100% murni tanpa bercacat sama seperti Yesus hidup. Manusia  nggak akan ada yang sanggup untuk tidak berbuat dosa sama sekali selama hidup.



Jadi prinsip orang Kristen seharusnya kita berbuat baik bukan untuk masuk surga, tapi untuk menyenangkan hati Tuhan & biar semata-mata nama Tuhan yang dimuliakan sebab kita sudah ditebus oleh darahNya yang mahal.😁

Namun aku percaya Tuhan kita adalah Tuhan yang sangat menghargai perbuatan sekecil apapun,

 

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(Yohanes 13 : 14) Aku memberi perintah baru kepadamu, yaitu hendaklah kamu saling mengasihi. Seperti Aku sudah mengasihi kamu, kamu pun harus saling mengasihi.

Injil di Yohanes dengan tema mengasihi jadi highlight dalam misa minggu kemarin, tapi yang harus digaris bawahi adalah ketika Yesus bilang bahwa itu adalah "perintah baru", dan apa bedanya mengasihi dengan Perjanjian Lama? 

Well, sebenarnya aku juga belum terlalu katam Alkitab, tapi kalau bisa aku renungkan mengasihi Yesus dalam Perjanjian Baru (PB) standarisasinya justru lebih berat dari Perjanjian Lama (PL). Kalau di PL fokus utamanya adalah umat Israel dan mengasihi sesama umat Israel, tapi dalam PB Yesus memperbaharui perintah tersebut untuk mengasihi sesama kita manusia terlepas dari suku, bangsa, agama, bahkan terlepas dari kebaikan orang itu yang patut kita kasihi. 

Pernah ada di season saat-saat nggak merasa nyaman sama situasi? I do.. Sekarang aku lagi merasakannya. Tuhan menempa di setiap aspek dari hidupku; pekerjaan, keluarga, masa depan. Aku ada di situasi yang cukup kompleks dalam hal pekerjaan & masa depan; dalam lingkungan pekerjaan yang nggak sehat, merasa sendiri, dan ketidakpastian menyelimuti.. Aku pingin seperti orang lain, tapi di hati kecil masih berkata "stay", karena hingga saat ini mencari tapi belum menemukan..

Ketika aku bergumul sendiri terkait kenyamanan pekerjaan, masa depan, aku jadi teringat : Tuhan nggak pernah bilang "kamu (harus) menjadi terang dunia." tapi Tuhan bilang "kamu adalah terang dunia." (Mat 5:14).... Terang nggak mungkin terlihat terang di tempat yang penuh cahaya, ia akan lebih berguna bila ditaruh di tempat yang gelap.. terkadang ga semua musim di hidup kita cerah, terkadang kita di tempatkan di situasi musim yang gelap & dingin; sendirian, penolakan, ketidaknyamanan, ketidakpastian, tapi satu janji Tuhan Ia tidak akan membiarkan kita tergeletak sampai jatuh (Mzm 37:24) & akan menyertai kita sampai akhir jaman (Mat 28:20)...

Terkadang kita ada di dalam ketidaknyamanan disekeliling "kegelapan", BUKAN karena Tuhan menuntut kita untuk MENJADI TERANG.. tapi pada saat itu lah Tuhan menuntut kita untuk MEMBAGIKAN TERANG yang ada di dalam diri kita..

Buah-buah yang Tuhan standard kan beda sama dunia. Mungkin untuk kesuksesan di karir, finansial, jabatan, bisa dengan mudah Tuhan memberikannya. Tapi itu bukan goal yang Tuhan mau, yang Tuhan mau adalah buah kasih yang ada di dalam diri kita bisa menjadi lilin bagi orang lain & yang paling jadi concern Tuhan dalam hidup kita, setiap musim di hidup kita menjadikan kita lebih seperti Dia (to be more like him).

Aku kutip dari salah satu Romo yang berkata pada ku "lebih baik aku lelah mencoba & berusaha walaupun gagal dari pada lelah menggerutu dan tidak pernah mencoba"


Di akhir Tuhan bilang "ini bukan tentang kenyamanan kamu, tapi bagaimana kamu bisa berbuah.."

So, tetap semangat di setiap musim yang dilalui, karena even mungkin itu hal yang tidak mengenakan, namun bersama Tuhan damai sukacita Tuhan yang melampaui segala akal akan selalu menyelimuti hati.

Raising topic about "God", "Religion", "Heaven" and "Hell" are always sensitive to some people or even groups. But personally for me talking about Jesus & Heaven is always interesting and endless HAHA 😝.. If you adore your wife or husband, should people call you insane? no, and this is me, I'm bothered so much when people say I'm too religious because I frequently post about Him. No other reason because Jesus is my Father, lover, and home, why should I get bored of Him?

From this post, I don't aim to Christianize people. But do you know why Gospel is said a good news? (If you ever realize that many times Angels in the Bible proclaim to deliver "good news") I think the picture I inserted here is so helpful to comprehend the differences between Gospel (Jesus) and Religion, and why the Gospel itself brings joy.

instagram @timkellerncy

Maybe if we are asked "why do we have to do righteous works?", The most common answer would be "to go to heaven." But the question is how to exactly measure if our righteous works are fulfilled to get us heaven? I think no one can answer EXACTLY what the answer is, and of course human could be the most pitied creatures that living the life based on fear & insecurity if it were so. 
 
In my opinion, for all people of any faith or even those who don't believe in the existence of God, it's beautiful truth to knowing that our God is LOVE and He is God of all living beings. 

One thing for us to realize that God demands us to live the life with joy. 

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." (John 14:27) 

I think why Bible oftentimes commands us to be joyful and not to fear because this world is temporary; what is waiting us next is everlasting, and God has taken control of death so that we can reunite with Him someday in everlasting joy. 

"I provide a place for you" John 14:2 

If you remember He also demonstrate His unconditional love for us through the parable of The Lost Son on Luke 15:11-24 , I will highlight how extraordinary & pure His love that beyond anything we could imagine;

illustration of the Father and the lost son

 “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him." Luke 15:11-24
 
you can conclude how His love for His son (us) in that Parable is bigger than our love to Him; It is demonstrating of the loving & forgiving heart of God.

"Jesus call a sinner not a righteousness" Luke 5:32

That's all the part of Gospel to spread the good news that we are already forgiven (even for our future sins).  

 I wrote a post too about the Fruits of Salvation if you are willing to read that, kindly check this out.

I don't say our good works are unimportant and if we are willing to forbid many things such foods, clothes, our life-style for the sake of God is useless thing; because our God is kind and He appreciates every little thing we do for Him. I know that people have different ways and perspectives to get close and honor someone they love. 

But I hope you know and understand that God's love for us is not dutiful. As Pope Francis said that God's love isn't something we earn or deserve by our good works, but it's FREE and UNCONDITIONAL.

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I ever heard the quote which says "your best partner is your bestfriend". Well, I have a little talk with my sister that she told me about her past struggling finding friends and finding out that the only best friend she has outside the family is her boy friend, who accepts her just the way she is.

Some millennial, maybe most of us think that the main requirement for a suitable husband is, he has to be established. And yes I don't deny it,but I think the most important thing is he should be our best friend. It does not mean that we have to know each other since we were kids,.


And you know, friendship takes time to build, so does relationship, it takes time to understand. There is the time to argue, there is the time to be apart but you know whatever the struggles are, he will get back you because you are his home.

 And here, I just want to share about mine. I used to think that the meaning of partner who came from above is the one who make you closer to Him by inviting you to go to church, or all of the characters are prefect just reflecting Jesus. But life isn't perfect, is it? and the person is either.
But what I find out from mine, that through my partner, God is trying to shape me to be more like Him.If you would like to know my story, you can click here

by wonderfulengineering.com

Sebagian dari kita pasti sangat setuju bahwa sumber mata airnya / PDAM adalah hal yang paling penting untuk mengairi air, dan itu nggak bisa dipungkiri lagi. Tapi pernahkah berfikir nggak bahwa dibalik sumber mata air ada hal yang nggak kalah berjasa, yaitu PIPA. Pernah bayangin gimana rasanya kalau nggak ada pipa, mungkin sumber mata air juga sulit untuk mengalir ke rumah. 

Pernah sadar nggak kalau hal ini sama seperti prinsip berkat Tuhan (walaupun nggak mutlak). Sumber air itu adalah Tuhan sendiri dan pipanya itu adalah alat Tuhan (yaitu kita-kita ini anak Tuhan) untuk mengairi berkat Tuhan kemanapun Tuhan mau.

Dulu banget pernah berdoa & bilang sama Tuhan kalau aku mau jadi berkat buat orang lain. Dan nggak pakai waktu lama, Tuhan jawab doa ku.

Aku pernah merasakan dimana ada hal-hal ketika temanku butuh bantuanku, dan mereka mendapatkan benefit namun aku dilupakan gitu aja sampai pernah berpikir "itu kan seharusnya aku, kalau nggak ada aku nggak mungkin bisa kaya gitu. Ataupun kok jadi dia yang dapat untung aku nggak, padahal aku yang bantuin dia, dan hal-hal lainnya."

Sampai akhirnya aku berfikir bahwa ini adalah cara Tuhan menjawab doa ku. Terkadang kita nggak sadar kalau kita dijadikan pipa sama Tuhan. Dalam mengairi air, pipa mungkin nggak dapat apa-apa dari sumbernya, tapi bisa orang lain yang justru dapat airnya.

"Blessed to be a bless" kata-kata ini paling sering banget mungkin dijadikan quote dalam bio instagram, status WA ataupun yang lainnya. Tapi yang mesti kita mengerti,
 
Ketika Tuhan memberkati kita dan kita menjadi berkat bagi yang lain, kita harus bisa "mengosongkan" diri kita, seperti pipa, dia kosong, jika dia nggak kosong air nggak akan bisa mengalir melalui dia. Ketika kita mengosongkan diri kita, dan Tuhan sendiri yang mengisi, kita harus bisa dikirim kemana aja, kemana air mau mengalir. Kita harus bisa membuang segala rasa perlu "diingat" karena tugas pipa cuma mengaliri aja tanpa perlu diingat apakah dia berjasa atau nggak.

Semoga kita yang udah diberkati Tuhan, bisa menjadi berkat / pipa buat Tuhan! Amin

Happy New Year 2019!!! Should I be joyful?

For me, resolution is not always every year, because I think every resolution or maybe goal is not always accomplished within a year; it takes process, yet it marks a new spirit, a new page for everyone.

First of all I would like to thankful to Jesus Christ, my heavenly father, who never cease to pour out His blessings, His protection over me throughout my years here, I think it's the most important thing we have to realize over and over again-- He is good all the time. Throughout 2018 I have seen like Tsunami, landslides, earthquakes, tornadoes hit Indonesia within a month in December and also an airplane crushed this year. I hope that all of the victims can rest in peace and God give comfort for the victims' family. I have no idea if I were in that position, but may it remind us always that God is great, and we are just like a dust on His foot. 

We are lost, we are wicked, we are sinful yet loved and redeemed by Amazing Grace. 

And these are 3 points to be my list in 2019 :

• BE FAITHFUL

for this year I don't have any specific dream or goal to be accomplished, sounds weird, huh?

But I have learn a lot from 2018, that God asks me to be more faithful for the "smallest thing".
I used to dream BIG, expect BIG result, but I forget the process. All of them take PROCESS, and God wants me to concern to SMALL THING before to the big ones.

And what's important now, I want to be grateful & grateful for my family, my friends, my daily bread, a home, a job that God has given me. I want to spend more time with my family, my dog and working hard to every work He has given me even if it's the smallest work; in order to delight Him, and a form of gratitude for him. 

• AWARE of MY IDENTITY

I hope you all and me be aware always this year that we are precious ones, we are loved. I want to be aware of my true identity here; there is nothing more amazing than knowing I'm a beloved child of God. I'm wicked yet loved, I'm spoiled yet wanted, I'm lost yet saved. I want to learn over and over to accept myself as the Lord accept me, and love others as the Lord love them. And to find out my purpose that God has designed for me here. This is hard and sounds weird, but this year, I want to learn to give up all of my personal ambition and let Him take control of what He is going to do through me.

• TO PLEASE HIM 

I always think to obey Him so that I can delight Him. But before we delight Him, we have to know first our Lord. That :

* He is Love; whatever we do for Him, do it by love. When writing this, I feel a half hypocrite that most of my deed is done not because of love; I do it because I have to, because this is my job, and this is my responsibility. 
And God reminds me through someone that God does not want we please Him because of compulsion. 
He wants us to please Him because we ENJOY it. Because we love to do it. I think "love" will become the most concern for me this year. 

* And I always think about what can I do more for Him, then He answer my question through this verse:

  Matthew 25:40 'Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.' 

Don't you think this is the most ordinary request and sounds worthless at once that comes out of a King's mouth? But it which makes our Lord EXTRAORDINARY. He doesn't ask us to give Him branded clothes, big castle, diamond, gold, or give much money to the church, yet He said whatever we do for the least we do it for Him.

Jesus always manages to make me amazed & touched. 💓💓

Well that is from me for 2019. May you all have wonderful years ahead. And May God still continue to pour out His blessings, His protection over us till we meet face to face with Him someday.

God bless you!